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'Survivor' Makes it to the Merge

By Lisa B. Jenkins

Thursday, October 27, 2005

06:00 PM PT

After last week's tribal council double-header, Nakum and Yaxha retire quietly back to their campsites. Well, okay, Yaxha retires quietly. Not so much Nakum, at least not where Judd is concerned. Chief Little Silence brags about putting recent bootee Margaret "in her place," leaving viewers envious that wherever Margaret's place it is at least out of earshot of this buffoon. He goes on an on, eventually running out of steam as everyone grits their teeth and ignores him.

There's no such luck ignoring the festering sores at Yaxha. It appears the tribe has been attacked by flesh-eating bacteria, opening up weeping wounds on their faces and arms, adhering fabric to skin and providing a nasty visual overall. But life goes on, and there's a reward challenge to think of. The two tribes congregate for a challenge that is half Twister, half maypole and all human spinning wheel. The lead passes back and forth as the Survivors dash about, winding themselves up in sheets of fabric one by one and then unwinding; it requires coordination and superb teamwork. Not surprisingly, Yaxha nails it.

Their reward is a zip line tour of the jungle canopy and a whole lotta chocolate. It's cute to watch them giddily swoop through trees (Amy cries, but is happy she did it) to a chorus of Howler Monkeys, then descend like a pack of slathering wolves on the chocolate and glasses of milk. "I hope I can hold that down," Brandon belches at the conclusion of their meal and so, in fact, do viewers.

Yaxha decides that in honor of Danni's birthday they'll invite Nakum over for a pool party. Bobby Jon compares it to Native Americans smoking the peace pipe before scalping each other on the battlefields in a rather remedial metaphor (is it just us or does "Survivor" need to start providing subtitles so we can understand what the heck he's talking about?). Yaxha paddles over to the rival camp -- where Rafe and Stephenie are getting up to a little sharkery with some playing cards they rigged out of leaves -- and holler an invitation. Jamie and Cindy mutter darkly about skipping the festivities but Stephenie and the others jump at the chance. Everyone is playing well together until Jamie interrupts with an announcement it's time Nakum left. All the nicey-nice "makes me sick they're getting along so well," he derides. Steph accuses him of petulance and declares to the camera that a day may come when she can't take him any longer.

With Nakum gone, Bobby Jon lingers in the pool. He watches with deadly earnest fascination as tiny minnows come to nibble at the scabs on his shoulders, and then he attempts to catch the minnows. With. His. Mouth. The rest of the tribe is engaged in somewhat less disturbing behavior as they begin the inevitable politicking should the immunity challenge go awry and/or merge be right around the corner. Amy gives Gary the once-over, outlining the beatdown she'll give him if he's lying to her about his storied NFL past. He sticks to his story, his Terrible Secret still tenuously safe.

Tree mail arrives; the immunity challenge is a giant puzzle. Each tribe must dig up their pieces, carry them back to the starting line, then two players assemble the whole thing. Nakum chooses Rafe and Stephenie (the latter an, ahem, interesting choice); Gary and Amy handle puzzle solving on Yaxha's side. Nakum locates their puzzle pieces faster, though Yaxha makes up serious time actually fitting pieces together. With superior teamwork and, likely, brainpower, it seems Yaxha is going to catch up. Alas, it is not to be: Nakum wins immunity and Yaxha has to sacrifice someone to the Maya gods.

And we must endure Judd for another week.

Amy realizes she's the biggest target and states her intent to outwit anyone else "on the island"; she's already outwitted us, because we're pretty certain the Survivors aren't on an island. Danni, taking a little genuine pity on her, floats Bobby Jon's name as a possible sacrificial lamb. After all, the merge is coming up and maybe it would be smarter to start eliminating the strongest competitors. When Danni mentions this to Brandon he quickly seizes on Bobby Jon as "less deserving" of winning. He seems only too happy for an excuse to cut bait on that alliance. Bobby Jon meanwhile opines that he would hate to be voted out this week and miss being on the jury, as being a 'Survivor' juror is his lifelong -- lifelong -- dream.

At tribal council there's a little back and forth as Brandon says it's hard to choose between someone you have an alliance with and someone you feel is deserving (at which point Bobby Jon nearly gives himself whiplash turning to stare down Brandon), while BJ weighs in with a mostly inarticulate ode to staying true to one's friends. At the end of the night neither one has much to worry about: Amy gets the boot, even from Gary. There are some tears and Amy struts off, giving her former tribe mates the rock n roll salute.

... Oh, but not so fast. The merge is upon us! The merge is upon us! Yaxha is sent packing for camp Nakum with new buffs, for tomorrow is a brand new "Survivor" day.

Don't say Lisa B. Jenkins is obsessed with "Survivor"; say she's really, really, really into "Survivor."

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